Wednesday, September 26, 2018

A Rant and I'm Pissed!

Be warned. This is far from my usual type blog. I'm so angry that I could chew nails and spit them out like a machine gun at a certain medical specialist!

I just got back from Atlanta's Emory Orthopedist.  I spent two hours driving to this appointment. Going 10 MPH on I-85 once in Atlanta on the six lane roadway. The office was in mid-town, of course. I spent a total of an hour and a half in the doctor's office and got an X-ray of my foot and ankle I didn't need. I went to the orthopedist for a lengthen of my Achilles tendon that had contracted. Tendons do not show up on x-rays. Doh!

I met with the doctor's resident first. Pretty well standard for university hospitals. No biggie. Then, the doctor came in and we chatted a bit. He asked how I came to his service. I explain my journey of months to him through this and that specialist. This doctor just shook his head and said I should ghve seen him in the first place to get my foot and and ankle fixed.

He talked about lengthening this lateral tendon and shortening that one, releasing the Achilles, and rebuilding my foot and ankle to get me out of the AFO permanently and walking normally again. Finally, something we could agree on! I asked him when and he flat told me he refused to do the surgery! Nothing like giving someone a lollipop and snatching it away!

I checked my temper and asked him why. He said he won't operate on anyone who smokes any substance.

Yes, I smoke tobacco cigarettes. I smoke around 5 a day (1/4 a pack) for a very good reason. Thirteen years ago my family practice doctor told me to. At the time, I had gone through my fourth bout of cancer. He knows all the times I've quit smoking for more than a year, I've developed some form of cancer. He actually begged me not to stop smoking again and he set the limit. Call it a cop out, or not believe it. For thirteen years I've been cancer free by following his sage advice. It's the longest period of time that I've been cancer free. Now this doctor wants me to quit smoking for six months before he'll operate?

That's not all that upsets me about this. Couldn't someone have told me his position. I dunno like when the appointment was made? A simple question like do you smoke? When I first talked to them would have let both of us know this was a waste of energy. I mean I haven't lied about my smoking with any of the doctors. It's been on my paperwork for the last four I've seen at Emory since May. I could have not wasted five and a half hours (my total time), half a tank of gas (round trip 220 miles), and the aggravation of driving in the rain in big city and interstate traffic! Oh, and fifteen minutes of HIS valuable time.

I spent the hour and a half driving home (wohoo! still raining but less traffic) fuming. Why tell me that they could fix me only to say they won't? Even if I put the cigarettes down today, it will be six months before I'd get this surgery. Oh, he added a barb to the end of our visit. He told me that the neurosurgeon probably wouldn't do my rhizotomy because of the tobacco use also. If he did, he was nuts. GRRRR!

I mean, wouldn't the neurosurgeon told me he wouldn't operate when I saw him in May? Self doubt is creeping in. This orthopedist has planted his seed of doubt. I'll have to call his team to be sure tomorrow. I can stop smoking. Putting them down and not lighting up has never been a problem for me. I went a whole month without cigarettes while hospitalized after my stroke with no ill effects.

So since May, I've been spinning my wheels on an action plan that didn't work! It's wasted my time and energy with no results. I've exhausted every avenue of hope and still in pain with no relief in sight. This doctor was cruel in his matter of fact, smug way. He dangled the lollipop and then snatched it away. It's now been six hours since I left his office and I'm still discombobulated! I really dislike people who make me feel like this. Now, I have to pray it away to get my peace back. Tomorrow is a new day. Thank God!

Nothing may be impossible but jumping through all these hoops can be exhausting.

11 comments:

  1. That was really cruel.
    Pray about it. Is there another doctor who could perform the surgery? You know what's needed and that it can be done - start making phone calls. It might be far away, but if there's someone who can do it and do it sooner rather than later, it would be worth it.

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    1. After a night of tossing and turning, praying, things are a little better. At least I'm not so angry that I'm in tears about it. I've let my fingers do the walking after speaking to my neurosurgery team.

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  2. I hope your team has a solution for you.

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  3. I wouldn't blame youself for not asking the question in the first place - that question should have come from the doctor's office, not you. What I WOULD have done is LIE. Would it make any difference in the result? Maybe I just think we know more than they.

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    1. Barb, there is a blood test that shows nicotine so lying isn't an option. nicotine is in your system, it slows healing.

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  4. Wow, Jo, that's really frustrating and interesting (to me) about your primary care doc's advice to NOT quit smoking -- as a smoker myself, I get a lot of shit for it even though I've cut back a lot -- and I've also seen a lot of people who quit then get cancer, hmmm, so your story is very interesting -- I don't have any advice except look for another doctor (maybe a doctor who smokes, ha!) my friend, Chris, had a primary care doc who was always "on her" to quit smoking until she saw him the parking lot with a cig -- and told him "I'll quit when you quit" and having spent a lot of time at a lot of hospitals, I will tell you a lot of medical professionals smoke -- Anyway good luck and I agree with Barb, next doctor, just lie about it. Or not really "lie" as you can do the old "I used to, but quit" which could mean anything, I mean I quit this morning, or last year, but will start again tomorrow. They don't know and are just doing the CMA (cover my ass). Good luck, and take care!

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    1. A lot of my quirky medical stuff stems back to irradiated genetics. My mother survived Nagasaki during WWII. These genes were passed on to me and my sister like the cancer markers. Not a lot is known. What works for others does not work for us and vice versa. About lying they have a blood test for that for 3 months.

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  5. Jo, I have the same problem but not quite as severe as yours. I have a benign tumor in my right foot that at times is almost more than I can deal with. They won't operate because I smoke. They did however put a needle in my foot that was the most painful thing I have ever experienced and then I could not walk for two weeks. The dr was really hateful when he found out I smoked. After he put that needle in my foot I told him my smoking was for the safety of people like him. That was in 06' and I still have the tumor and I have not been back. Anywho, still praying for you. Will send you an email soon.

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