What are the biggest challenges that you face in regard to disability?
What do you think are the biggest challenges that your family members face in regard to disability?
We are a two person household with only me being the only one capable of doing everything or anything, I'll answer both of these at once. My biggest challenge is dealing with my husband, and just doing what needs to be done and accepting what doesn't get done.
For over a decade, my husband has slowly been winding down on what he can do. It left me to fill in where he couldn't. Up until last year, he could walk outside, get the paper and the mail. Now he can barely walk to the door. Ten steps from where he lays. Because of all his medications and the tumors in his body he is easily confused and instructing him to do anything is like talking to a two-year old in a grown man's body.
In my mind the male ego is like egg shells. Strong enough to hold the egg's contents, but can't be stepped on without exploding its contents all over the place. Similar to a man dealing with a woman going through severe PMS. One wrong step and there are explosive consequences. So I basically weigh in on all sides before doing anything. It's quite a stressful way to live, but I manage.
|Able to do before my stroke|
There are many examples of this in daily life post stroke. Adaption is never as good as the original ability to do. It can be close but never perfect. While not a "A" type personality, there are areas where my drive for perfection can take over. Cooking and writing are two of these areas.
It irritates me to no end that I can't lift a pan or pot without two hands. I always have to downsize what I've planned to lift it with one hand. Every day I'm thankful that we are empty nesters instead of having small children who need to be fed, bathed and well, just about everything done for them. Yes, I do most of this for my husband, but he isn't thrashing around and fighting me while I do it. Or at least not usually. But I digress.
With writing, my frustration level blows the top off the meter. Even writing this blog takes three hours just to get the words on the screen and another two in an attempt to get it legibly edited. Trying to write like I used to do is almost impossible right now. This blog is my adaption. It helps make it possible for me to write again one day. Or at least, that's what I telling myself. Yes, my typing and writing have improved over the years, but no where near good enough to attempt the simplest of stories let alone a novel.
Even with all of this, one of my goals for the year is to restart writing my nonfiction, Don't Get Your Panties in a Wad. I hear you out there,
"You're a glutton for punishment, aren't you?"Nope to all of the above. I'm a writer. Writers write. The frustration I feel in writing is only half as much as my overwhelming desire to write. It is almost an undeniable urge to write that only another author understands. It's almost causes physical pain not to do it. The call will be answered.
"With all you got on your plate?"
"Why stress yourself and add to your frustration?"
"Cut yourself so slack. Just chill more a while more and it will get easier."
What do you find is the most challenging things in your life and how do you conquer them?
Until next Tuesday, I'm outta here for the Redefining Disabilities Project.