Wednesday, February 26, 2014

More Stroke Happenings ~ Aphasia

I write quite often about my aphasia...difficulty speaking since my stroke. Here is a aphasia recovery  support group. What they say is so true. Patience is all we require when communicating with us. A very enlightening video. This is mostly why I prefer online conversations rather than phone or in person chats. I'm actually a very social creature.

I have a couple major pet peeves with communicating with others in person on a whole...
Talking to me as if I AM RETARDED. I am not mental retarded just recovering from a brain know, brain damaged caused by oxygen deprivation and blood being where it shouldn't. My IQ is higher than most I speak with, so there is nothing retarded about me.

My readers don't do this to me just people in face to face meetings. I just have a problem recalling all that stored knowledge when I want it and have a problem getting the thought to come out of my mouth that is proper and understandable. This is tremendously irritating! For God's sake, stop it.

Getting up in my face and speaking very loud and slow as if I was DEAF. I actually hear very well. It just takes me a few seconds to understand what you are saying and formulate a response.  Getting that close and yelling at me will accomplish two things; it is very uncomfortable because you are in my personal space, and two, it's jarring and further jumbles my thought pattern. Whatever response I was going to make flies out the window and has to be arranged again.

Most people will repeat the procedure thinking I didn't hear them compounding my problem. Did you check your breath before doing this? I'm just saying.You can also make me deaf by doing this! For God's sake, stop it.

Don't repeat yourself four or five times because you think I may not understand. If I don't understand, I will ask you to repeat. Now, this wasn't always the case, but it is now. Most people don't realize I have a language/speech problem until I open my mouth to speak.

Especially since my stroke, I'm a very attentive listener. Each time you speak, I will stop what I was doing (thinking of your reply) to listen to what you are saying. As you can imagine, this is maddening! For God's sake, stop it.


Nothing is impossible with determination.


  1. Great post about what NOT to do and what NOT to say and I'm sorry that you are forced to deal with this. I do understand how you feel. I have cancer and some people make really dumb comments to me. Comments like "WOW is that a bad cancer?" Is there a good cancer? Really?!? So I understand.

  2. Jo, I totally relate, as my husband has aphasia and it is sooo irritating when people treat him as he is retarded! He's not. He also has a high IQ. Also, when people SHOUT at him! grrrr-- he's not deaf! and I also see how irritating that is to him. And I don't understand why people do this...

    But, I must admit, I sometimes repeat stuff when I don't think he understands....especially when he keeps answering me with something nonsensical like "fingers, fingers"--- I do get frustrated and repeat the question and demand a "yes" or "no" and not "fingers" as an answer. It's frustrating for the both of us. I guess I need to be more patient.

    Aphasia is so hard.


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