Sunday Stroke Survival ~ Neuro What?

The first I heard about neuroplasticity was through a television commercial. Like most non strokees, I always looked for ways to utilize my brain to the utmost capacity. More than likely the same was true for you. I had no idea what neuroplasticity meant. I sort of assumed it meant some form of brain power training.

 

After my stroke, I heard the term again. Not from my rehab team, but from other stroke survivors. I still lived under the assumption that what you got back in the first six months was it and I needed to learn to live with the adjustments.

Boy, was I ever wrong!

You can teach an old dog new tricks or relearn forgotten ones. The brain is constantly developing and learning. Or in the case of stroke survivors...relearning. One of my guiding principles in life is that death is the absence of learning. As such, I made it a point to try one new thing each day. I still do even in spite of my stroke. Although the list is filled with things I used to do but haven't since my stroke because of physical limitations. It doesn't stop me from trying. I want my old life back and consider my stroke recovery my lull. It has enabled me to live outside the box with permission. Permission to think abby normal is a great thing.

My therapy exercises are still done, but I change them up with different things to challenge myself. I know me. And this is important that you know yourself. For me, I tend to get bored with doing the same thing over and over again. I thrive on challenges. Yes, it is sort of setting myself to fail, but it also gives me a chance to figure out a way to get the task accomplished. See I don't look at failure as not achieving, but a challenge to figure out how to accomplish a task.

It's using my brain power. Yes, I may try a dozen times and not succeed, but eventually I will figure out a way to get it done. After a stroke, you have to be determined to succeed.  No matter how small the achievement it should be celebrated. Celebrate it with whatever you like. For me, it's one of those blow things you get as a party favor. For the life of me I can't remember what they are called. I'll toot my own horn a bit.

It may seem egotistical, but hey, I deserve it. Go figure. I can use a word like egotistical and actually spell it right on the first go around but I can't remember the name of that blasted blow thing! Such is the way of stroke recovery.

A long time ago, I realized I didn't know it all. But that didn't mean I couldn't learn a lot of things. I was in fact practicing neuroplasticity. I was constantly reteaching this old dog new tricks. Now with my stroke, I'm slowly relearning what I once knew and trying new coping mechanisms to accomplish what my stroke impairs me from doing.

While pre-stroke I played with thinking outside the box, I now am constantly there because I can no longer use two working hands and two working feet. I use a spell/grammar checker in all things language orientated when before I abhorred it. Abhorred- another word that fell in the proper place. Now what is that blow thingie called? Think brain think. Ah, brain damage! You got to appreciate the irony of being able to instantly recall some data while losing others forever.

Thinking outside the box is a challenge. It exercises your brain. It stretches like silly putty what is impossible into something possible. There are a lot of gaps to work around in my brain. While I know it has redundant capacity for use, it does get frustrating some times. But does it stop me? No! I won't let it.

I was at my father's 80th birthday party recently and when you combine his children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren that's a lot of names to remember. My niece brought her brand new finance with her. He was told he'd be tested on who everyone is and what family they belonged to afterwards. Just to remind y'all... I have one biological sister and eight adopted siblings. Of my siblings, we are all grandparents now. That's a fair passel of people.

In the end we told the young man that we were joking. It's hard enough for us to remember who is who. I'm confused by my eight going on nine grandchildren, but I can always remember who belongs to whom because they act just like my daughters. This year's birthday was doubly sad with my father's rapid onset Alzheimer's and failing health. He could remember his children's names but didn't recognize them except for me.

If neuroplasticity is the way the brain stretches itself like elastic...in constant relearning then Alzheimer's or dementia is the failure of neuroplasticity or antineuroplasticity. While I look forward with hope of recovery that can take place in the coming years, my father will regress farther into the antineuroplasticity.

The abilities of the brain to heal itself or not heal itself is a gray area of gray matter. It is a young science that constantly contradicts itself with the passage of time.  What is believed to be true today might be proven wrong tomorrow, but for today, I'm hoping that my brain can recover what it's lost with my strokes through the neuroplasticity models. At least it throws the door wide open  to try. Now what is the name of that blow thing?

Nothing is impossible with determination.

More Stroke Happenings ~ Aphasia

I write quite often about my aphasia...difficulty speaking since my stroke. Here is a aphasia recovery  support group. What they say is so true. Patience is all we require when communicating with us. A very enlightening video. This is mostly why I prefer online conversations rather than phone or in person chats. I'm actually a very social creature.

I have a couple major pet peeves with communicating with others in person on a whole...

Talking to me as if I AM RETARDED. I am not mental retarded just recovering from a brain insult...you know, brain damaged caused by oxygen deprivation and blood being where it shouldn't. My IQ is higher than most I speak with, so there is nothing retarded about me.

My readers don't do this to me just people in face to face meetings. I just have a problem recalling all that stored knowledge when I want it and have a problem getting the thought to come out of my mouth that is proper and understandable. This is tremendously irritating! For God's sake, stop it.

Getting up in my face and speaking very loud and slow as if I was DEAF. I actually hear very well. It just takes me a few seconds to understand what you are saying and formulate a response.  Getting that close and yelling at me will accomplish two things; it is very uncomfortable because you are in my personal space, and two, it's jarring and further jumbles my thought pattern. Whatever response I was going to make flies out the window and has to be arranged again.

Most people will repeat the procedure thinking I didn't hear them compounding my problem. Did you check your breath before doing this? I'm just saying.You can also make me deaf by doing this! For God's sake, stop it.

Don't repeat yourself four or five times because you think I may not understand. If I don't understand, I will ask you to repeat. Now, this wasn't always the case, but it is now. Most people don't realize I have a language/speech problem until I open my mouth to speak.

Especially since my stroke, I'm a very attentive listener. Each time you speak, I will stop what I was doing (thinking of your reply) to listen to what you are saying. As you can imagine, this is maddening! For God's sake, stop it.

THINK!

Nothing is impossible with determination.

Sunday Stroke Survival~ It's All About Balance

I'm trying to find my new normal after my second event (stroke). I don't know if I can do it but I'm going to try follow the stroke e-zine guides that republish me for March. I know it isn't March yet (almost) but they will publish the articles during March. So here goes...

It's all about balance in everything you do either as a stroke survivor or not.  I know the gist is supposed to be about balancing to keep from falling but I am taking a different tact because I can. :oP

I'm going to talk about rebalancing your life. You've heard the old saying, "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" or something to that effect? It is so true. When you don't listen to your body other things crop up to make you listen and regain your balance.

In the hospital and when I first came home for about three months, I was in rehab mode. In fact, I had little energy to do anything else because I was exercising three times a day! I was that determined I was to get everything back. I refused to compromise with what was. I had no energy to speak of to socialize. When I wasn't physically moving towards improving my body, I was attempting to improve the cognitive function of my brain and dealing with overcoming my aphasia issues. I was an automaton. Sleep, medications, eat, exercise, and rest. All because I was told that this was the way to get it all back in recovery.

Credits

Pain stopped this nonstop routine. I had torn my AC joint in my right shoulder in a tumble. Yes, I had to stretch it to get the motion back, but nothing as intense as what I was doing before. As a result the elbow, wrist, and fingers regressed. It took a total of six months of slow, painful healing to restore the joint. While this was going on real life stepped in. There were trips to the store, learning to drive again, and visitors to contend with. I began to socialize more as my aphasia lessened. I was regaining a balance of sorts.

But I was still doing leg exercises and walking. My daily walks reached almost a mile a day. If I couldn't work on my arm then I'd have to double my effort on my leg, I reasoned. Eventually, I'd get rid of the wheelchair, hemi-walker, and cane for good, if I kept it up.  My actual physical balance was much improved to where I could walk on flat, level surfaces without anything. I was pleased! The next goal was to walk outside on unlevel surfaces without anything.

But that wasn't to be. Enter the decubitus. Walking with the AFO caused a pressure sore.  The inversion of my foot worsened as spasticity raised it's ugly head. It wasn't enough that I had to contend with the Clonus that kept me out of a Walk-Aid, but now pressure sores too. Man, I couldn't win for losing. That put me off my feet because I could only be up walking for two hours and out of my brace for four hours. I was having to relearn another new balancing act.

Before my stroke I had medical issues like a bum ticker, diabetes, and replacement joints to contend with but before I could do almost anything I wanted within reason. Yeah, there were limitations, but not like what I've dealt with post stroke. Meanwhile the window of opportunity for full recovery closed or at least for a quick recovery. Granted there is the neuroplasticity factor but that takes years!

Umpteen dozen doctor visits later, the first pressure sore healed. So I begin PT again. I was still pushing for an 85% recovery at this point. I entered the revolving door of pressure sores on my foot. To date there's been six and no possible resolution except surgery to fuse the ankle in place to get rid of the AFO. Yes, it is as painful as it looks! The swelling gets so bad that my size six foot needs a size eight shoe.

With all of this going on my husband is getting weaker and sicker than he's ever been before, so I adjust my life style further to include all these changes except I've found my balance again. I have a rather sedentary interspersed with insane activity lifestyle these days. But in between I still do my stretches and exercises, spasticity and Botox allowing. I'm not so fever pitched on recovery. It will happen when it happens in slow increments. I take the time to enjoy doing things with my grandchildren and friends. I bake and cook again (a major love) with adjustments for my limitations. I garden, granted it's in raised beds and not almost a half acre. I care for and train my animals (4 hens, 3 meat rabbits, Buddy the Angora, Belle the Guinea pig, 2 German Shepherds, and 2 cats who rule the roost.

I've gone back to my guiding principles of "Don't sweat the small stuff and it's all small stuff," and "Death is the absence of learning." In other words I'm getting to know the new adapted me. I've remembered that God is in control and while I'm waiting, I have a life to enjoy. It may not be the ideal life, but it's the only one I've got to live. I've found my balance again.

So when you think about all the things in your life, it's important to have balance in all things.

Nothing is impossible with determination.

Post Stroke Encouragement

As y'all know, I spend way too much time on youtube and I'm an urban homesteader (survivalist).  I ran across an interesting video this morning on OurHalfAcreHomestead. Mrs. Volfie had a turkey poult that was prematurely hatched that appeared to have a brain injury.

It definitely caught my interest being brain injured myself ... a stroke survivor. It just goes to prove that you can learn something from the new "boob tube," the internet. It never fails to amaze me where my day's encouragement comes from to keep me going on.

As a stroke survivor, if we all had therapists so in tuned with our recovery as this woman, we'd all be whole again.


Take a gander. If you are not rooting for this tom by the end...there's something wrong with you.

 

Granted we are not turkeys. It takes us longer to relearn. But with enough encouragement, this sky's the limit. 

Nothing is impossible with determination.

Happy Valentine's Day

For a holiday that the card and candy companies thought up to drum up business, it's a happy day for me personally. I'm going to get mushy here.

Today is the 22-year anniversary of my husband asking me to be his bride. It has been a short and long time. If I had known what would transpire, would have said "yes" all those years ago? Yep! Because for better or worse, and in spite all the garbage that flushed through the pipes he is still my beloved.

Marriage is about give and take and bringing out the best of each other. Good and bad has a way ofbalancing out in the long scheme of things. I thank my ex-husband each and every day (although we rarely speak) for the bad marriage we had because I probably would not have appreciated my reward for going through the hell I went through with him. Yes, sometimes you have to suffer the bad to appreciate the good.

The saying, "you don't appreciate what you've got until it's gone" isn't true if you embrace what you've got daily. If you've got a relationship that you are committed to, that good or bad is more valuable as a whole, and you've found your soul mate stick with it. I've got that. I've got my knight in shining armor ready to battle against the whole world for me. A man who will stand beside me even if we disagree. I will miss that when it's gone. Will I really appreciate it when it's gone? No because I'll always be able to refer back to it.

So honey, this blog is for you. I don't write romance, but when you live the life we've lived who needs books.

Happy Valentine's Day y'all!