Sunday Stroke Survival: You Know You're Paralyzed, Right?

"Doh!" was my response.
This following question another patient made they made after hearing me tell my physical therapist what I have been doing on the homestead since I last saw him a week ago.

This was followed by the usual comment I hear, "You do more before noon than most people do all day!"

Yes, that's true. I operate a mini farm and homestead. To others homesteaders, I'm barely doing anything. That's true also. I'll call a homesteading friend and they will have done twice the amount of work done that day. I guess it all depends on your point of view. It really doesn't seem that much to me, but when you recite my list of morning chores most "ordinary" folks are exhausted just thinking about it.

From 4AM to 7AM, you'll find me in the kitchen. I'm starting the day's baking. Breads, rolls, breakfast pastries, and desserts for the week are prepped. I'll also eat my breakfast. Usually yogurt, homemade granola cereal, or oatmeal. Occasionally, I'll scramble some eggs and have some toast. I'll hop on the computer to play some wake up my mind games, answer and read emails, check the day's schedule, etc. I'll feed the cats and dogs, giving them plenty of ear ruffles before I head outdoors with them tagging along.

From 7AM to 10 AM, you'll find me with the chickens, rabbits, or harvesting the garden. I'll gather wild plantain, poplar and oak leaves, assorted grasses, clover, and other weeds for the rabbits. While technically their diets is complete with fodder and timothy hay, I figure the rabbits would like different things to munch on too. I sort of rotate how much of each they get per day and change it up. Each will get individual attention...mostly snuggles and nose to nose Eskimo kisses. Dustin is usually ready for his morning physical therapy session. I usually feed him first so he's ready by the time I finish everyone else. I'll gather the eggs before I head inside. I'll also set up Mel's morning cup of tea.

The chickens get the bucket full of caterpillars, beetles, and assorted bugs I find in the garden as well as their ration of fermented grains (wheat. barley, sunflower, and oats) and a commercial organic chicken  food. The chickens will also spend the bulk of their day free ranging in our wooded back acreage. I'm also setting up next rotation the fodder and fermented grains. Broody or Gimpster (as Mel calls her) gets up in the dog crate to be fed and have her alone time away from the roosters who aggravate her unmercifully. The cage door isn't latched and she lets herself out when she is ready to rejoin the flock.

All in all, our animals are pampered if not spoiled rotten.

From 10AM to 3PM, I'm baking whatever I started earlier and washing the day's harvest. Then, I'm processing the harvest. Canning tomatoes, okra, and eggplant (for right now). Black-eyed peas, herbs, or other harvest is set on trays in the oven for the pilot light to dehydrate them.

From 3PM to 5PM, I'm usually doing my off the homestead doctor or therapist visits, feed stores run (including for us), etc. Or, I'm grooming rabbits. Or, I'm helping Mel with this or that project around the homestead. I'm also prepping dinner unless I'm running late and pick something quick before coming home.

6PM to 10PM, I'm cleaning up the day's mess in the kitchen. Not that I'm not doing this during the day too. We are watching our favorite Netflix shows or watching YouTube. But I'm also knitting. Right now, I'm working on a 12" wide scarf for Mel. After that project is done, it'll be socks, baby booties for crisis pregnancy, and dishcloths.

From 10PM to midnight, I'm usually at my computer. Playing mind building or just for fun games, writing blogs, answering and reading the 50 odd emails that have come in during the day. I'll finally lay down for the night amidst the sounds of crickets, frogs, cat purrs, and an occasional coyote call.

So what do you think? I'm I too busy or just busy enough? Yes, I know I'm partially paralyzed. Yes, I know I'm living post stroke. The point is...I'm living.

Nothing is impossible.

Stroke Class with Susan ~ Late Again, Perpetually

One of these days I actually going to attend the live class. Now, for the third week in a row, I was absent. I did manage to squeeze the 45 minutes in yesterday.

But then again, that's the beauty of this type of class. It fits your schedule. Mine is terribly hectic. That's why I think this exercise class will be a lasting thing with me except it's not a free trial anymore. There is a monthly subscription rate of $19.95. My personal pledge to do the exercises twice a week has fallen by the wayside this week with my new AFO fittings, OT, hospice, my hubby's pneumonia, and assorted other things. It's a real shame too since it was the last one I could attend.

I just can't get my life back to the orderly world I once had. My master juggler status has been a long forgotten feat since my stroke. I thought being a mom of five, two careers, caregiver for three elderly parents, and being an author was tough. I had no idea what tough was. My earlier life was just a primer for today and I'm failing miserably. Well maybe not failing, but only succeeding with a lot fewer balls. In some ways, I'm supremely thankful not being able to work.

This would be a salad plate

Part of the problem with not attending the exercise class is my husband's new eating schedule. We now have our big meal around one-ish instead of around six. The reason I say one-ish is because the time will vary because of when the aide, nurses, and appointments happen. Stroke Class is at 1:30. It may be closer to three before I can set a meal before him. But he's eating better. He's actually gained two whole pounds in the past month since the change over and his calorie intake has gained a whopping 300 calories per day. Yeah, I keep track. He now weigh 97 pounds. Five out of eight grandchildren now weigh more than he does.

I'm still measuring food by the tablespoons for him. We also do a reverse weight loss thing for him. It takes twenty minutes for the stomach to register it's full. So he crams as much food into his stomach for that amount of time. Granted he feels stuffed to the eyeballs afterwards, but he's getting almost twice as much calorie intake.

Yes, I could make it easier on him and myself by buying Ensure, but have you seen the cost of these nutrition supplements? $7.99 for six cans and that's for the store brand. It's not covered by insurance or hospice. It's cheaper to cook for him and give him vitamins. But I do give him one supplement about 11 PM to take with his bedtime medicines. For him, it's got to be dark chocolate and ice cold. It may mean going to up to three stores to find it-maybe on sale for a buck cheaper for me, but he's worth it. It accounts for one-third of our monthly food budget. But he's got to have it. The dying process is full of hidden costs between dying and dead.

Meanwhile, I watch what I'm eating the same way. I'm hoping with my new AFO to start exercising on my machine again because I can stand without pain for longer than thirty minutes. You'd think with all the stuff I do I'd lose weight, but no. Unhappily, I haven't. Round is still the shape I'm in. Between combating fluids with 40 mg of Lasix and a poor eating schedule, I still weigh more than I should. But since the Stroke Class with Susan is out of my price range, but my machine is available to me that may not be my legacy.

Nothing is impossible with determination.

Sunday Stroke Survival~ The Schedule

I have received numerous e-mails regarding, in essence, time management.The basic question is...how do you do it all?

The simple answer is... I am woman! I'm a wife, mother with an empty nest, writer, advertising specialist if even for my own books, care giver for my terminally ill husband, a stroke survivor doing therapy, a minister while not participating, and a multitasker now impaired.

The stroke I had in May 2012 impaired my mobility on my right side, impaired my cognitive skills, and severely limited everything I once did as a master juggler. I don't call myself the master juggler any more even though it might seem that way. I'm driven, ambitious, and stubborn. That's about the gist of it. I refuse to lay down and die unless I'm not breathing. I refuse to accept I can't.

I have spent weeks and months of the past eight months sitting on the pity pot. Honestly, the sense of mourning what I've lost is part of the healing process. You don't mourn someone unless you loved them. You don't mourn the loss of skills if you didn't possess them and used them. The same is true for me and everyone else on the planet. It's to be expected. While I may spend some more time on the mourning process in days, weeks, and months to come, I've reached the point of being proactive.

Let me break down my day for you and how I manage. I set up early morning routine things like the medicines, clothing, etc the night before within easy reach for first thing in the morning.

5AM- Yep, I do get up at this hour of the morning. I roll over to my night stand and grab the vial of morphine and a syringe, and place them on my right side of my pillow. Grab a alcohol swab and wipe down the bottle. Draw up the pain killer and inject my hubby's rump. I won't have to do this for another 4-6 hours so my time is my own relatively. Do my morning prayers.
5:30- I'll put on my AFO, pants and shoes and toddle off to see to my personal needs- bathing, brushing hair and teeth, and urinating etc.

6:15- I shaved 15 minutes off my morning ablation since I've been home from the hospital. Yeah me! I'll go into the bedroom and check my husband's vital signs. He's so used to this routine he rarely wakes up.
6:30- I'll walk without cane, my balance is so good at this point where I rarely use my cane indoors, to the kitchen grab the milk and a cup of hot tea, and carry them into my office. My hubby pours off covered bowls of cereal and keeps five bowls stacked into the office for me. I'll lay out my morning medicines, all ten of them, and fix my breakfast.
6:45- I'll eat my breakfast and check my e-mails in three accounts. I'll delete all the trash and spams first.
7:30- I'll carry my dirty dish to the bathroom and wash them. I'll check my hubby's vitals again while he's still snoozing.

8:00- I'll load pogo and play the daily challenges. Then I'll make a small pot of tea because I won't be getting up again for at least 20 minutes. I'll hit Bingo Luau first because I've made some cyber-friends there, and then play various games that I keep under favorites for easier access. While I'm playing I'm using my e-stim unit on my ankle and wrist. All in all, I spend about an hour doing this. It allows my muscle relaxers and Lasix to work. I'll also place a heating pad on my shoulder to loosen it up for twenty minutes.
9:00- Check on hubby and give more morphine if needed. Begin my PT and OT exercises. If I'm scheduled for hospital based therapy I might not do this, but I will walk into my game room and ride my air-cycle for a minimum of twenty minutes.
Around 10:00- It depends if I have hospital based therapy. I'll make my husband's coffee, I can't stand the stuff. Make him some muffins in my cake pop maker, and wake him up. I'll power up his computer so all he needs to do is pour himself a cup, and sit down in his office chair.He'll do his nebulizer treatment, inhalers, and other medicines from his pill box I set up weekly. If I'm at therapy the time backs up for an hour or two.
10:30-Bathe, shave and help hubby dress. Get him situated back in the office. Neat trick one-handed.

Noon- Lunch time. Either we go out to lunch, have lunch with the girls, or I make a salad, canned soup, or a sandwich. I'll take one of my muscle relaxers, I'm supposed to take four times a day. I'll clean up and start to write.
2:00- time for another PT/OT routine.
3:00- Nap time in braces. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
4:00- Will play three games of Poppit on pogo to wake my mind up.
4:15- Will write or research. May surf Books and Writer's Forum, and check e-mail.
4:30- Prepare dinner. On the menu tonight is herb roasted chicken breast, baked sweet potatoes, mustard greens seasoned with smoke turkey wings, and fresh baked apple turnovers. Aren't you jealous? But the beauty of this menu is that it's so simple. I can hear you now, apple turnovers are simple? Yep, when made with stewed apples, crescent rolls, and my handy dandy cake pop maker. The apples are easy enough to cut up with a fork. I can cut the crescent dough into circles for the crust. Dust them with blended Splenda and rice flour while they are hot. Yummy! I will say 1 chicken breast will feed both of us.

By 6:15 meal is finished, dishes done, medications are taken/administered etc and time for me to relax. I'll watch a movie via Netflix or some television time.
8:00- Will write some more, or look over some else's writing, read blogs, pre-write my blogs for the coming week, or check e-mails. I'll do another round of PT/OT exercises and e-stim and brace time.
10:00- My final medicines and husband's morphine. He'll stay up for a little while longer or doze in front of his computer. I'll monitor his vitals.

10:30- Arrange things for early morning, say my evening prayers, and go to bed.
2:00 sometimes,  I'll remedicate my hubby and get him into bed...mainly just involves waking him up enough to pile into bed with me.

Any schedule has to have wiggle room. Mine is no exception.

• Now if there are doctor appointments and shopping that needs to be done, I'll forgo my afternoon nap. This tends to make me cranky and feeling exhausted. 
• If my grandchildren are at the house all schedules are skewed a bit besides medicines.
• My writing time may be longer or shorter, or no existent depending on what's going on.
• Emergencies like the power going off and my hubby stopping breathing changes everything.

I find scheduling out routine activities helps to keep me on track. With my forgetful nature since the stroke, having a schedule helps break up the day and keeps me on task. I never believed in them before, but now I'm sold.

Each day I try to accomplish sometime new and break up the routine of my exercises and stretches. I'll hoop and holler when I get even an inch more than the previous day. I'll drive around the neighborhood to gain confidence. I do the Snoopy dance of happiness even if it is one sided or mentally.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my brain the most. For me, playing games on pogo is therapy for my cognitive functions. I'll list them including why I play particular games.

• Bingo Luau for number recognition
• Scrabble or QWERTY for spelling
• Hangman Hijinks for spelling within a narrower field
• Tri Peaks Solitaire for sequencing
• Bejeweled 3 for combination
• Mahjong Safari for matching/memory

• Poppit for analytical thinking and strategy

It mainly may be fun and games for most people, but for me it's helping to regain my brain power. My husband and I agreed to subscribe to pogo each year as part of our anniversary present to each other. Since my stroke, it's been worth it.

Keep writing and loving the Lord.